Today I have woken with pain
It’s a the cold. I like the cold. I prefer it
But my poor body doesn’t
Over the last decade I have been told that
My pain is from being depressed, fat or sedentary
That it would go away if I
Got out more, exercised got a job lost weight ....
Well meaning advice I’m sure from those that have no idea
Well I’ve done that
My job is a mum and grandma
Both I think I do well
I exercise
I’ve lost weight
I get out and have coffee and shopping with friends
And you know what
I’m up again in pain
But hey I look great
I must feel better right?
There are a select few that know the truth
My buddy in yarn and pain who has now moved to Queensland but we still chat constantly on messenger
Who reminds me to stop, rest and wrap myself in my heated throw
My words with friends mate. Who while beating me reminds me to not overdo to
Remember to rest
And praises me on my craft work
My poor suffering hubby who will come home to an angry wife because she is exhausted and in immense pain
So she takes it all out on him
And he realises she needs coffee cuddles and sleep
These people are the ones that know!
The ladies at Knitting group, who only see me occasionally as I’m busy with my “job” so miss
Weeks and then miss a few more due to crashes
But never admonish for missing weeks but are so very happy to see me when I come
And always make me laugh
Who never offered unsolicited advice but rejoiced at my weight goals
Who never judged but accepted
When your down you realise who your real friends are
But when you crawl back up, you know who truly loves you and is there for you
This is what I have learnt
They say pain is here to teach you
I know what it has taught me
It’s not about the outside, it’s not about you house or your car
It’s about you
You heart
And your soul
Don’t waste your time on those that don’t love your soul
Be with those that listen without judgement
And love you no matter how ugly your looking and acting
Because they see the real beautiful you
See ya xx
I can hear the pain in your words. Wrap up in that heated throw and for goodness sake keep warm. You've come so far with your exercise and weight loss, now you need a winter home further north!!
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about the pain. I hope you're feeling better very soon.